Single men looking to join a swingers club isn’t always the easiest thing to accomplish. Swinging is typically a couples activity. However, many couples enjoy having a third involved, and dealing with other couples can throw the numbers out of balance. Because of this, single men do have limited opportunities to fit in with couples. Here are a few tips.

Swingers Club Events

One of the easiest ways to fit in with a couple is to attend a swinger’s club event or swingers party. For single men the clubs will typically only have a certain number that are admitted. To ensure you are one of the men that end up being allowed admittance, you should call ahead and find out if you need to reserve a spot. If they don’t accept reservations, you want to show up early enough to be allowed in. This way you don’t have to worry about all the spots already being taken up.

Go Online

Another good way to find couples you will fit in with is to head for the internet. If you join a swinger’s forum or swingers dating site you can increase your chances of finding another couple. This way when the couples want to swing with a third, they will just invite you to the party of event. Since you are going with another couple most clubs will allow you in without any issue. Just be aware that you will be watched and held to higher standards. You risk getting kicked out if you are found to be trolling around looking for other couples. Only if you are invited to join should you join. You won’t be allowed to lurk.

Someone without a mature attitude won’t last long in a swinging lifestyle. While age isn’t terribly important, the maturity level is. Here are a few reasons why.

Open Mindedness

The swinging lifestyle is only going to work for those who are open-minded. Some younger people are open-minded enough, but this typically comes with experience. Swingers do many different types of activities, and this could include BDSM or cross-dressing, and someone with a low level of maturity may not be open to this.

Healthy Sexual Relationships

Another reason maturity is so important revolves around being able to form a healthy relationship. Jealousy is common and normal, and someone who isn’t mature won’t be able to confront and deal with this natural reaction. Rules and boundaries can help jealousy, but those with limited experience in relationships and sex won’t understand how to deal with the feelings when they come up. A swinging couple needs to be able to express their feelings openly and honestly with one another before the problems come up. Having a plan to deal with jealousy is something else that mature couples are able to implement to reduce the strain it could cause on the relationship.

Age Limits

All swingers’ clubs will require that everyone attending be at least 18 or the legal age of majority for their jurisdiction. Since alcohol may be involved in some events, some clubs require the age to be at least 21. Even at 21 many couples will be apprehensive about playing with someone who is younger simply because the age difference can create issues.

When you are new to swinging it can be challenging. It’s not uncommon for newbie’s in the lifestyle to be nervous and not understand how it all works. Being a single man or a man in a swinging relationship can make this even harder. Here are a few tips that will help you transition in to the lifestyle more easily.

Join the Right Site
Make sure that the swingers site that you join is busy and vibrant, check out the personal ads for your location, for example if you lived in say Waterford, Ireland this sites section on Waterford Swingers would show you that the site is busy, is regularly attracting new members and that the existing members are active, a busy site means more choice.

Check Out the Forums

Swinging forums are a great source of information by actual swingers. People will tell stories of their past experiences, and this allows you to get a better idea of what you should expect as a new swinger. You can also read how couples find a single man to join if this is your situation. Swingers are an open minded bunch of people, and they won’t chastise you for asking questions. This makes forums invaluable when it comes to swinging for newbie’s.

Setting Rules

If you are involved in a relationship with someone who wants to swing, the first thing you should do is set some rules. Each couple will have their own rules, and there are never any rules that are wrong. It’s just a matter of what works for you. The purpose of the rules is to keep the relationship strong while decreasing the jealousy factor. Jealousy won’t disappear entirely, but with good boundaries in place it does help decrease the feelings.  If you are single and looking to swing, rules are still important. If you’ve been invited to play with other couples, you need to know what their rules are. This will eliminate any issues with their relationship and will allow everyone to enjoy themselves.

A MMF threesome means male-male-female. When most people think of threesomes they think of a single man with a few women. These threesomes are great for men who have bisexual curiosity, or for women who want to experience double penetration scenarios. If you want to try a MMF threesome, here are a few things to keep in mind.

Setting Rules

While it may sound fun, without setting rules it can be a disaster. If the men are interested in bisexual play, this should be mentioned before anything is set up. This way there are no surprises that could potentially ruin the mood. The same goes for the woman involved. If she is okay with the men playing together it should be brought up beforehand. Many women are excited about the idea of watching two men together, but they don’t want to participate in any DP action. This is why it’s vital to set up rules and boundaries before any threesome begins.

Protection

Protection is also important when planning a MMF threesome. Beyond condoms, lubricants should be involved, especially if you are planning DP or bisexual activity. You should make sure the condoms are changed before each different act and different partner. Never use the same condom between multiple people, as this can spread infection and disease.  If you are using toys in the mix, either use condoms on the toys or don’t use the toys on multiple people without washing them well in between. To keep the mood going, it’s a good idea to just use the condoms and keep a good supply on hand.